I’d say it was more a case of intelligent design.
CLICK (once, then once again) TO EMBIGGEN
via Geeks are Sexy
Remember that massive Street Fighter 25th Anniversarybox set we’d mentioned a while back? Well, MTV Geek got their hands on it and went full on gonzo with the picture taking. Capcom, we’ll here at Modern Borefare will also take one, if you’re offering?
Nintendo Tributes; 21 of ’em. Good thing it wsn’t 23, otherwise the eschaton would have been immanentized.
Alan Moore discusses his new H.P. Lovecraft project. Uh oh… Lovecraftian hentai in 3…2…1…
All the Borderlands 2 secrets you could ever want! Yes, these are SPOILERS…I have not read them & am torn about it. The only thing I hate more than missing a secret in a game is having it spoiled for me. Conflict!
Brief bit of Site News:
We here at Modern Borefare know that the posts have been a little slow lately but please bear with us. We’ve got a whole flood of stuff in the works that we know you’re going to enjoy. As always, thanks for reading!
Huzzah! After an endless X-crossover, an energy force with a bad attitude is merging once again with a human host to create a Cyclops man-thong destroying dark god; indeed, it looks like the Marvel U. will once more graced with the Dark Phoenix. May she also eat overlong annual “events”, the rotten bastards who have cancelled both NextWave AND the current iteration of The Defenders, whoever dreamed up Deadpool Kills the Marvel Universe, all extraneous X-books, Wolverine’s ever shifting backstory and Peter Parker’s annoying new sidekick.
Whomever transmogrifies into the Dark Phoenix this go round, I’m pretty sure this will be their theme song:
(image via Comics Beat)
After the jump, a one panel summation of why NextWave was/is completely amazing.
**SPOILERS BELOW BE WARNED***
The Walking Dead 100 -Oh you’re in some shit now! Wow. Barn burner of an issue.Very much a change in the status quo of this series. For too long (the past year at least) the story has been in a bit of a holding pattern. There’s been forward momentum, yes, but nothing like this episodes (with apologies to Mao) great leap forward. Began is a BAD DUDE, on par with if not actually surpassing The Governor. SPOILERS: Lucille, on the other hand…oof. Negan’s threats regarding Carl are equally chilling: “Anyone moves at all..cut the boy’s other eye out and feed it to the girl.” Brrrrrr. Then when Rick acts up, Negan threatens to have his men run a train on Carl. END SPOILERS. A bad, bad dude. This is what a landmark issue should feel like.
Batman 11 – Finally the conclusion to Court of Owls. This arc really petered out, didn’t it? ‘Cause it was SUPER bad ass to start with, but with the ridiculous turn it took last month with the SPOILERS reveal of Bruce Wayne’s (ugh) long lost brother END SPOILERS I’m really on the cusp of not caring. Luckily the return of the Joker arc is right around the corner, which promises to be stupendous. Some things (ed. note: Only SOME things?) really stood out for their sheer ridiculousness this issue, including the flying Owl & Batman sequence where a) Bruce gets thrown into/through a giant skyscraper window. DUDE THAT WOULD KILL YOU. But then b) the Owl can fly up into an oncoming jet’s flight path? Isn’t that like, 20,0000 feet in the air? Then c) when Bruce gets chucked into a jet engine and somehow he’s able to hold onto the lip of the engine and not go all Fargo on us? Trained to the peak of human skills is one thing, defeating physics is quite another. You know who I felt bad for after this issue? The almost completely built but now completely destroyed Wayne Tower. Oh, and me, for having to read Bruce & Dick’s ridiculous heart-to-heart to end the issue. Bring on the Joker!
Batman and Robin 11 – The more I read this series the more I really, really like Damian as a character. His curent quest to best all of the past Robins in single combat is just perfect: funny, dynamic, interesting, they draw on past history & continuity as well as really showcasing Damian as a character. An aside: since we’re speaking about continuity (and I think I brought this up before when The Killing Joke was mentioned) how & where does A Death in the Family come in to play in the New 52 universe? I honestly thought it was a clean slate, yet they keep referring to pre-52 landmark events. Is this ever going to be explained? What’s still considered canon & what got jettisoned? Aggravating. Anyway, Damian is a bratty little know-it-all 10 year old who will kill you in the blink of an eye; that’s a character that could’ve gotten so cliche so fast and yet Peter Tomasi is doing an awesome job with him. The rest of the book was ok; the most intersting aspect is the cut-rate rogues gallery that’s assembled to attack Gotham who’ve all in someway been seriously f’d up by Batman, including the guy with a permanent boot tread on his face (named Bootface, natch) and the other guy with a batarang stuck in his skull. Interesting to see the after effects of a Batman thrashing. The hands down cheesiest part of this (or really, any recent issue of anything) was Bruce yelling “LEAVE MY CITY ALONE!”. Keep this was just being yelled out on the street and not to anyone in particular. It just struck a very odd chord.
Bloodshot 1 – I still have the Valiant-era Bloodshot #5 (the issue where Ninjak shows up for the first time (non-costume); I bought it at a sports memorabilia store that dabbled in comics and hadn’t yet discovered that particular issue was the hottest book going in comics, so I was able to get it for cover price.) somewhere. Anyway. Great cover, incredibly smart opening page explaining exactly what nanobots do and how they affect teh human body as well as some nightmare “Grey Goo” scenarios (read your Kurzweil, folks). What I liked: the concept of hackable people. Bloodshot’s ingenious infiltration method. The overall feel and look of the book. Hints of Bloodshot’s past and who/what he was/is. What I didn’t like: where’s the explanation for the dead white skin? Probably coming later. Also, why is KRESSSSHHH the sound effect every comic ever uses for when someone breaks through a plate of glass? PROMISING.
Chew Secret Agent Poyo 1 – Don’t f with this chicken! Funniest moment may have been the look on Hitler’s face as he was directed towards the room labelled “Butt Torture” and followed by a demon with a pineapple in his hand (this was happening in Hell, btw). Grossest was probably the bonus gallery in the back, especialy the pinup featuring an eyeball with a pencil jammed into it & another eyeball with pushpins and needles poked into it. EYE SHIT IS GROSS QUIT IT YOU GUYS. If you like Chew (you do) , if you like clever jokes (duh that’s why you’re reading this) and most importantly you like good comics that don’t take themselves too seriously this is a PICKUP.
Dancer 3 – Cat & mouse sniper espionage games with Europe with your Irish girlfriend as bait. I could see this as a movie. C’mon, they made Red (the movie was shit, also). I bet at least one person picked this up thinking it was a spin off from Omaha, The Cat Dancer.
Defenders 8 – This book has just been…is this one of the best books that Marvel is putting out right now and probably no one is buying? Most definitely yes to the first part and probably for the second part. This has the same vibe that Nextwave had and that is one of my favorite series ever. High points of this issue: flaying car in the shape of a cat face? Absurd, but they are in Wakanda. Silver Surfer with the funniest line about the origin of bones in the entire history of the Silver Surfer. Then some deeply weird stuff to close out the issue, including the revelation there are things out in the Marvel U. called DEATH CELESTIALS and they are coming to break the Universe. How cool is that?
Harbinger 2 – Peter Stancheck Comes Alive! Woe to everyone else on the planet. If I had to list a Top Ten of favorite on going series, all three Valiant titles (this, Bloodshot and X-O Manowar) would all be on it. Can’t they crank these out faster?
Ultimate Comics X-Men 14 – I’m done. For reals this time. I just can’t take these half-assed cliffhangers that I just know will not pay off in any sort of meaningful manner. If I’m going to start cutting back, I think it’s going to be with Marvel’s Ultimate line.
Wolverine & The X-Men 13 – Less whimsy, more punching. As previously stated, not exactly what I want out of this title. But I’m really digging Nick Bradshaws art, as I think it does tremendous justice to not only the characters but fits the story very well. The intro page was a very clever Watchmen dig. Reading this book made me realize that all of these characters are just terrible at problem solving. ARGUE ARGUE ARGUE….now what? oh right, PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH. You have magic powers, alien technology and super-powers, yet you still resort to fisticuffs like this is some 1880’s public house and your honor was just impugned? I realize that you have to keep cranking these books out but just like the realization that everyone’s costumes, for the most part, are simply awful, I know realize that 20 pages of punching is not as appealing as it once was. I am sad? Oh right, SPOILER Gladiator died? END SPOILER. Warbirds backstory was pretty cool, I’ll give the that.
Large pickup this week (but when isn’t it) but a real dearth of time. Reviews soon! What did you get this week?
Batman and Robin 11
Before Watchmen – Minutemen 2
Bloodshot 1 – most anticipated book of the week (tie)
Chew Secret Agent Poyo 1
The Massive 2
The Walking Dead 100 – Most anticipated book of the week (tie)
Ultimate Comics X-Men 14
Wolverine and the X-Men 13
Can he finally become the party animal the Canadian government trained him to be? Let’s all find out…together.
Not to be super negative here but when I’d first heard about this project I was really excited about it. After seeing this cover, I’m…less so. What about you? (Via)
The important take away this week is thatwhen I say I’m not going to buy a book anymore, more often than not…I’m still going to pick it up. Case in point with:
Wolverine 310 – arts improved but what do you expect when Simone Bianchi is back on the title. I don’t think Loeb’s really bringing it this issue but I’m definitely intrigued as to how & why Sabretooth came back. He was killed via the Muramasa by Logan himself (apparently the only weapon that can kill Wolverine dead.) and once more in Hell. Yet he’s back, popping up the last few months. Other points of interest: a)Who could possibly pick this book up and figure out what’s going on? This is a perfect example of why a reboot is needed. Completely choked with bizarre continuity. b) So they’re up in Alaska and Logan’s savior shows up in a one piece bathing suit. You’re not cold?? c) Once more back to Silver Foxes and back to Weapon X. How many times is this material going to be revisited?
AvX 7 -Magick v. Scarlet Witch; this should be interesting.Here’s my problem with Wanda: her powers are so ill-definied that they could be anything. So she’s shooting hex bolts one minute, then wiping out 99% of the mutant race, then completely neutralizing the Phoenix? BE CONSISTENT. Speaking of, what did Clint shoot at Emma to completely scramble her? I know he continued on that road by soccer kicking her, Pride-era Shogun Rua syle. But then it ends poorly for Mr. Barton, but what did you expect, you kicked a demi-god in the face!Favorite line of the issue goes to The Black Panther and “…the Black Panther prowls the boundary between super science & magic”. Has anyone else noticed that they can never draw Hope right. Sometime she looks like a super model and other times ( like this issue) she looks like a 12 year old. Interesting move by Emma which leads to a fantastic splash page to close out the issue. Anyone else notice the cool little touch of Namor crushing the balcony he was holding on to after his disagreement with Cyclops?
Uncanny X-men 15 – Assault on Sinister! If Marvel’s 616 universe is happening in one analogous to ours, albeit with super heroes, how does anyone take them seriously? You’re telling me that the Marvel U 616 Conan isn’t making cracks at Cyclops’ red thong? Fox & Friends aren’t calling Emma a tramp? The Phoenix Five’s (still hate the name) condescension and verbal head-patting of the other X-Men is pretty funny. “Don’t get up, we’ve got this”. Somehow I expect Sinister to hand them their asses and need a save. But that’s just me.
Animal Man 11 – Very cool call back to the original Animal Man series to open this issue. Buddy gets a warning from his quas-saviors to “Be still, this will hurt very much. ” Alberto Ponticelli might be the perfect artist for this series; his drawings of The Rot are truly grotesque.
Swamp Thing 11 -We’re finally on the cusp: The Green & The Red vs. The Rot begins next issue! This issue is just the final set-up push to get there. Not really feeling Marco Rudy’s art for this series though, much preferred Yanick Paquette.
Thief of Thieves 6 – A question for anyone reading this book: The hand image that makes up a portion of the title on both the cover and the credits page…is that a famous image from something, possibly Hitchcockian? That image also makes up a Tumblr & WordPress theme so it has to be fairly well known. This seems like a bridge issue too; the big payoff looks to be (but probably won’t be) next issue. Which I think will help determine where this series is headed. Because right now it seems like this could just be a 7 issue mini-series.
Amazing Spider-Man 688- Synchronicity ( and not The Police album)! The Lizard shows up just in time to coincide with the release of the Amazing Spider-Man. Here’s a question: how does Spider-Man heal? He gets the piss beat out of him on the reg but as far as I know he doesn’t have any sort of accelerated healing powers. My favorite part of this issue is when Mary Jane called out P.parker for his incredibly dumb new motto “When I’m around, no one dies”. I think she’s the mouthpiece for the comic book community because that is just the absolute thing SM has ever said. Another issue: does SM have some sort of voice modulator in his mask or something? He bursts into Horizon labs where he works with people (geniuses, mind you) that he begins shouting at. How do they not match Spidey’s voice with Parker’s? C’mon!
Amazing Spider-Man 689 – Moebius drooling over bloodwork is a perfect tough, as is The Lizard pretending to cry.”What is the proper human response to the? Ah. Flailing limbs. Wet eyes. Mewling.” Madame Web lives in my neighborhood (Astoria!!).
More after the jump, including the Book of the Week.
(ed. note: Intrepid contributor ViciousPjuraHead is spending the summer in Italy and will be filing dispatches of a gaming or comic related nature, when he gets around to it. This is the first.)
Due to my traveling schedule, my comic book thoughts have been delayed. The best part of traveling is spending all those hours on planes and trains (and automobiles?). Since I’m always on the move, I save all the comics I want to read for just those occasions. I’ve just touched down in Rome to teach English at a day camp, which hopefully won’t take up my entire days, leaving me ample opportunities to get the goods, sit in a nice piazza and read away.
The beginning of my trip was fairly auspicious, what with the airline losing my luggage and me being stuck wearing the same thing for three days in the Roman heat. Ignore anyone who says different, the heat is what caused the downfall of the Roman Empire. After watching 21 Jump street many,many times (ed. note: C-Tates!!) to pass the time but I am now settled with comics in hand!!! When in Italy….start with the comic that deals with Italians…….
Dancer #2 – Still enjoying the story but for some reason I cannot get into the art work.
Astonishing X-Men #51 – For a comic book issue that is supposed to touch on one of the hottest topics in society, this issue was not as nearly as exciting or edge of your seat as I’d have thought. I understand that a wedding is much more different from a huge battle among superheros but the writing seemed a bit too “do it for the sake of doing it to get it over”. The art was not very captivating (Is Wolverine supposed to look like Elvis?) and what was the deal with Warbird? Has she always had these feelings or is this something they just threw in to cover all sides of the gay marriage spectrum. Just seemed a little out-of-place. This book did very little to keep me entertained and interested.
The Crow #1 – As a kid, there wasn’t a movie I was more obsessed with than The Crow. Brandon Lee’s death, the soundtrack, the story, something about all of that just hit me at the right time and it just became my everything. God only knows the amount of posters and pictures I had on my wall (God: You had 36). I don’t think I ever saw City of Angels, nor did I ever really care to. However, sic transit gloria. The obsession was gone…until I saw this comic at which point all of those memories came roaring back. I think this is a great opportunity to go back, revisit the comics and maybe look at these comics & the movie from a different perspective, maybe try to figure out why they had such a hold on me as a teenager. As I started reading this I was trying to compare every page and every panel to the movie, which was ultimately frustrating because almost nothing was similar. It wasn’t until the last two pages where the connection happened and the AAAHHH moment hit me. The main character is in the wrong place, wrong time scenario and the quest for revenge begins. I’m definitely going to read the next issue and am honestly hoping that it continues to hold my interest.
AvX #6 – – reminiscent of The Authority. Cyclops still auditioning for lead singer of Cameo. Hope actually looks like a teenager. Emma is wearing something wholly impractical. Thor v. Cyclops! Ok, this book has definitely redeemed itself, especially with the final panel & Cyclops pronouncement. This could actually be leading to something bad-ass! I will definitely stay tuned.
Before Watchmen: Comedian #01 – I’m starting to come around on these Before Watchmen titles. This offered some interesting twists on established ’60’s myths, so I applaud them for that. The one thing that always bugged me about Watchmen was, if seemingly everyone knew Eddie Blake was The Comedian at one point in time, why was everyone then so mystified & amazed when Rorschach uncovered Blake’s secret costume stash in Watchmen#1? Did everyone forget? Answers people! I need them!
Daredevil # 14 : A Date with DOOM!: Ok, it’s not really called that, but Dr. Doom does show up up. In fact, last we saw Matt he was trapped in a box in Castle Doom in Latveria. HOW. WILL. HE . ESCAPE? I ain’t saying nuthin’ beyond “clever premise.”
Fables #118 – a terrifying twist I didn’t see coming. Much creepier than expected.
Grim Leaper #2 – Still an interesting premise, but the last panel, while disgusting, also introduced a brand new character that had me leafing back through the book trying to figure out exactly who was being talked about. Hate that. Though I dug the little 4 part EC Comics-esque story in the back, which featured a whole new disgusting way to kill someone.
Saga #04 – I guess Vaugh takes a while to get going. The story is definitely ramping up and there’s super bizarre things popping up in every issue. I just hope he starts to unveil a bit more of the narrative soon.
The Dark Tower: The Man in Black #01 – First off, The Stand is one of my ALL-TIME favorite books (the unabridged version, of course). Odd then that it took me until just two years ago before I picked up The Dark Tower. While the comics were cool and some beautifully illustrated, they just felt like re-treads on something I’d just read. I picked this up as a way to hopefully shine more light on one of King’s strongest creations, Randall Flagg a.k.a The Main in Black a.k.a The Walking Dude.
The Punisher #12 – Frank still has one eye, but that doesn’t stop him from stomping his female quasi-partner senseless in a trash-filled alley over a picture. Why am I still reading this?
The Walking Dead #99 – Set up set up set up. Issue #100 promises to be huge. At this point, how can they not kill Rick? I think that’s the safe bet. Or even crazier, EVERYONE gets eaten and they just end the series that way, on the darkest note possible.
Uncanny X-Men #14 – Did Mr. Sinister just say he was a eunuch? Regardless, an XCELLENT (see what I did there? That’s called laziness.) return to form here. Mister Sinister, here in his current role as devilish 19th-century English gentleman, shines as a an almost unparalleled mastermind. Really, like Lex-Luthor-from-Red-Son type shizz. From the interesting twist on “let loose the hounds!” to learning how far his genetic manipulation & cloning goes, Sinister as a serious threat is back. Pick this issue up.
Wolverine #308 – I can already tell this is going to be terrible…(opens cover) yep, I was right. This is clearly House of 1000 Corpses / The Devil’s Rejects, just set in the Marvel U. & starring Wolverine. It also seems that the “brain-wash Wolverine to be a secret killer thing” has gone beyond trope & into the realm of cliche. This was was much better done in Mark Millar & John Romita Jr’s Wolverine: Enemy of the State.
Wonder Woman #10 – Not as good as past issues but it does feature an interesting escape from Hell and a dog-headed medusa gets head-butted by an Englishman. HEADBUTTS FOR ALL.
Side Note: What’s with the MILLIONS OF DOLLARS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS ? Read With Leather’s Best & Worst of Raw to find out. It’s one of the highlights of my Internet week.