Trailer Park: Captain America – Civil War aka The One With Spider-Man

“Underoos!”

Well now…

Advertisements

Unsure How To Feel: Georges St. Pierre to Play Batroc the Leaper in Captain America Sequel?

Via  MiddleEasy and SuperHero Hype comes today’s hot rumor: UFC Middleweight champion/ultimate wrestlefucker is set to play Georges Batroc a.k.a Batroc the Leaper in the upcoming Captain America sequel, The Winter Soldier. How many grains of salt do you have? You will need them all for this. But if true…is this inspired casting or just stunt casting?georges-st-pierre-vs-matt-h

EQUALS

Batroc_pompes_h

?

So just who is this purple suited jumping guy? Well, according to Wikipedia and my own brain, Batroc the Leaper is a master of the French martial art savate, the sole (ed note: haha) purpose is to teach you AMERICAN SWINE some respect. Or just making with the face kicking, I don’t know.  There’s the link, you go look. Also:

Batroc has no superhuman abilities, but is in peak physical condition in every respect. He is an Olympic-level weightlifter and has extraordinary agility and reflexes. His leg muscles are particularly well developed enabling him to leap great distances with the equity of an Olympic athlete. He is an expert hand-to-hand combatant and specializes in savate (French-style kickboxing). He is also a skilled military tactician, having formerly been in the French Foreign Legion.

Batroc is also an experienced thief and smuggler, and can speak both French and English. Although, as a mercenary, he does not hesitate to perform any number of criminal acts for his clients, Batroc has, by his own rights, a strong sense of honor, and he will turn against any client whom he feels has unfairly deceived him into committing crimes to which he might not otherwise have agreed.

Hell, you can watch the Human Weapon episode about savate right now:

“Look out Cap! He’s using the jab to set up the takedown! Ahh, dammit. Well, he took you down.  No worries though! He’ll just lay on top of you until I ring this buzzer.  Once he let’s you up, just smash him with your shield a half dozen times & we’ll call it a day.”  – every onlooker ever when GSBatroc shows up.

Can’t Stop, Won’t Stop: The Unending Tide of Marvel NOW Art

This time for December solicitations!

Prepare thyself: Marvel is slated to cancel a whole spate of books and relaunch a slew of other books.  I mean, you knew that, being the savvy comic book fan you are.  But please realize that not EVERYONE knew it, so Modern Borefare is here to (Soulja Boy?) tell ’em.  Bleeding Cool (artwork source) has the run down for you but the gist is: Wolverine, Captain America And…, Uncanny X-Force? Cancelled.  Wolverine, Cable & The X-Force, All-Star X-Men, Monster’s Inc, Uncanny Avengers? Relaunched or just plain new. For you.  But not in ’92. This is 2012; embrace it!

Start Saving Now: Marvel Films 6 Disc Blu-Ray Set

IT COMES IN A S.H.I.E.L.D. BRIEFCASE. There’s some sort of Tesseract light up Rubick’s Cube inside! Movie memorabilia that you’ll never look at again!  This is a steal at $200, meaning the only way I’m getting this is if I steal it. (ed note: Modern Borefare does not endorse or condone stealing limited edition S.H.I.E.L.D briefcases stuffed with crap.) Though right now it’s 40% off if you pre-order through Amazon. What are you waiting for??

Who’s Up for some Medieval Avengers?

Another day, another set of stunning images from deviantart.  This time it’s the Avengers, reimagined in a medieval motif by artist ~theDURRRRIAN.