June 12 Can’t Come Fast Enough

To prepare for the 2014 FIFA World Cup, ESPN is doing a very nice job at covering every team until the tournament begins (32 Teams in 32 Days). Additionally, some cool, specialized artwork has been created for every team (you can see all of them here) and I’ve added some of my favorites below. The teams I’m rooting for, in no particular order: Italy, because I’m an Italian and and have greasy hair.  The Netherlands because I like their style of play and because they win the prize for brightest color in the tournament.  America, because, well….I live in America and the poster features a guy who looks like me (a bald tough guy). Can’t forget France, because I didn’t think it was possible to make French people look so intimidating.

 

Winter is Coming…..But Football’s Here Now

Today is the day that most of America waits for (ed.note: not me). No, its not the first day of school. That’s just me.  My new school looks a lot like Alcatraz from the outside…and on the inside as well, surprisingly enough.  I don’t know how that place passes inspection every year.  What I’m mean is Thursday night is the kickoff off the NFL season.  Could it be possible that people who watch 300 pound guys brutalize each other over a ball also really enjoy fantasy political gamesmanship, dragons, dire wolves and 800 feet walls of ice? Eh, it’s probably the copious, copious boobs.  But if you ask The Bleacher Report, they would say “yes, yes, one thousand times yes” (ed.note: I checked with BR; they said they would never say that).  Here are some awesome pics of your favorite team getting the Game of Thrones treatment. Check out his page for the full list.  (via Djroomba)

Friday Night Flix: Trollhunter

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Welcome to Friday Night Flix, where there’s never a need to leave the couch or put on pants. Each week I’ll recommend an under-the-radar movie currently available on one or more of the major streaming platforms. They won’t all be classics, but every selection is guaranteed to be 100% watchable or your money back.

I was one of the few people who after they saw The Blair Witch Project actually believed it was real. It wasn’t until a few hours after the movie that my buddy who I went to see it with told me it was fake.  He didn’t make fun of me or laugh at me, he just thought that I didn’t know much about all the hype surrounding the movie.  It makes me think that possibly somewhere in Norway there is a similar young child out there who shares those same feelings for the movie Trollhunter.  Granted, Trollhunter is a bit more sci-fi but some mockumentaries do a good job of camouflaging there real art.  It’s for this reason why I can’t just dismiss Trollhunter as a silly, run of the mill, goof type of movie.  Maybe for some 15 or 16 year olds, watching this movie will make them want to become explorers or mountain dwellers or even spelunkers.

The movie starts out with a bunch of college students researching a person who is going around and poaching bears. Things become interesting when the students begin to think that possible poacher is not so much after bears but after something else. They decide to follow this man, named Hans, in the woods to find out what his real MO is.  Not so much bear poaching, but troll hunting, in order to shield the people of Norway that trolls exist.  The students witness this and now Hans has no choice but to take them along for the ride.

It’s easy to say that a movie of this type would not take itself too seriously. But somehow, Trollhunter doesn’t go into the realm of the complete ridiculous.  Ridiculous. Maybe, but COMPLETE ridiculous. Not so much.  Trolls can’t eat humans with too much vitamin D or else they will turn to stone.  Better not be a christian, cause that’ll be the death of you.  See, ridiculous, but not too ridiculous.  Trolls passing gas while they sleep. Ridiculous….I better stop here or else I’ll have to change my stance.  America has been in a vampire funk for the last few years now and hopefully that phase will pass.  Are the trolls of Norway the vampires of America? Is this such a fascination to them as we are obsessed with Bella and freakishly pale Robert Pattinson?

As mentioned earlier, Hans is trying to keep the existence of trolls a secret from the people of Norway by the order of the government.  But what if we do encounter a troll?

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