The CinemaSins YouTube channel came to my attention three weeks ago when they posted a hilarious take down of The Amazing Spiderman. The general idea is a witty, rapid-fire narration pointing out all the inconsistencies, lazy plot devices and general crappiness of a given movie. At the end each flick is invariably sentenced to eternal filmic damnation for its crimes. Fun, right?
The video above is their most recent effort, titled “Everything Wrong With Prometheus In 4 Minutes Or Less”. I’m surprised it only takes four minutes because that movie was an atrocious piece of shit, at once offensive to Alien enthusiasts and incomprehensible to neophytes. Truth be told, the Prometheus vid is the weakest offering the group has put out so far (Seriously, no one realized the two finger salute is the UK equivalent of the middle finger?) but it has its moments. If you enjoy this one, I definitely recommend checking out the videos for Spider Man, The Dark Knight Rises and (my personal fave) The Avengers. Who knew 2012’s best genre movies were so full of holes?
(Answer: everyone who watched them.)
Yesterday Sony Computer Entertainment of America filed a patent application describing a method for embedding RFID tags in game discs. The intent is to allow the next gen Playstation, codenamed Orbis, to prevent any given disc from functioning in more than one console. Like, ever.
If this super awesome customer loyalty program gets the green light, no more buying used games at Gamestop (whose shares took a nose dive today, thanks to this little nugget of information) or selling them back for a pittance of store credit. No more loaning games to friends or trading on internet swap-meets like swap.com. No sir, Sony wants alls the monies. You budget-minded consumers who can’t afford to buy every worthwhile title at full price can go play fucking Farmville. So what if a game is three years old and already has two sequels by the time you get around to trying it? Tough shit, kid. Sony hates you.
[via NeoGAF and Kotaku]
I love Bubba Ho-tep far more than your average citizen. No one wants a sequel more than me. But people, it is NEVER going to happen. Stop setting yourselves up for heartbreak. Even if financing could somehow be secured, the long-rumored Bubba Nosferatu doesn’t go forward without Bruce Campbell as Elvis Presley. It’s set to take place during the twilight years of the King’s career, exploring middle age the way Bubba Ho-tep tackled senescence, so Campbell would have to play a character no older than 43. Campbell is now 54, which is a stretch but doable. In five years? Not so much. If someone had wised up right after Ho-tep demolished the festival circuit back in 2002, Campbell would have been the perfect age. Ten years later, the proverbial doomsday clock is at five minutes to midnight.
Well, just to torture me, Giamatti recently revealed two juicy tidbits: he’s ready to play Elvis’s manager, Colonel Parker, and the script is really good. Go ahead and read the full post at Bloody Disgusting if you like. Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure they won’t yank the football away this time.
The Walking Dead isn’t just the best genre TV on the market, it’s one of the top-rated shows period. Another series that ranks right up there both in terms of quality and popularity is Sons of Anarchy, a personal favorite of mine despite the crap ending to last season. SoA‘s creator, Kurt Sutter, recently took to WhoSay via Twitter to decry AMC’s treatment of his friend and colleague, Glen Mazzara, who took over as showrunner when AMC shitcanned founding Walking Dead producer Frank Darabont. Continue reading
Do you live within driving/flying/teleporting distance of NYC? Do you like video games? Then you need to get on over to the Museum of the Moving Image in Astoria. Through March 2013, MMI is hosting a very impressive exhibit showcasing the 100% playable history of the sci-fi shooter genre.
Visitors get tokens with their admission fee and have the option to purchase more so they can rock out at original Asteroids, Space Invaders, Defender and Star Wars arcade cabinets. Whippersnappers lacking respect for their elders are welcome to plunk down their coin for a few rounds of Portal and Halo 4, but the nostalgic will find more to enjoy in console classics like Battlezone, Metroid II and Star Fox.
The centerpiece of the show is a faithful, fully functional model of the Digital Equipment Corporation PDP-1 computer, on which in 1962 enterprising MIT “hackers” created the granddaddy of all sci-fi shooters: Spacewar! I absolutely plan to spend my visit parked in front of that circular screen, mastering the use of the sun’s gravitational pull to gain the advantage over enemy ships. Art is awesome.
Now that this petition on whitehouse.gov has gathered the requisite 25,000 signatures, there is simply no other possible outcome. Once Congress realizes the impact the moon-size space superiority platform will have on our economy, senators will be climbing over each other to be the first to vote yay. Construction jobs alone will pull us out of the recession. If only the world could produce a sufficient amount of steel in less than 800,000 years.
I did notice one flaw though: the petition fails to ensure said Death Star is built without a giant exhaust tube leading straight to the reactor system.
[Via NBC, Kotaku and pretty much everywhere else.]
– You like Star Wars? You like BOOZE? You like…nevermind, of course you do. Too bad you have to travel to Paris to check out Dernier Bar Avant La Fin Du Monde (“Last Bar Before the End of the World”), the geekiest bar in The WOOOOOOOORLD. But sans any spare cash, you can always check out their Flickr feed.
-Speaking of eateries that cater to particular tastes: if you live in/near NYC, you can visit Action Burger in Brooklyn. What’s Action Burger’s deal? According to their (terrible; c’mon guys get it together) website:
Action Burger Inc. is owned by Steve Bala (creator, comic book & G.I. Joe guru, action figure collector). Action Burger is now open and making deliveries, Action Burger will be a family place to eat good food, talk about/debate comics or super heroes, learn the history of comics, play old school video games, watch super hero movies & cartoons. Action burger is about constant change (displays and wall comics will change every few months), eating good food and having a wonderful experience at our restaurants. These days restaurants don’t provide an interactive experience and exciting environment. They provide food, but missing on exotic displays and friendly conversations. Come in and debate your favorite super hero with Steve or other customers. Bring your kids to learn and experience the history of comics/action figures & sci-fi movies/cartoons from the 50s-00s. Come by and eat a villian or super hero burger, start up a conversation with owner Steve. Ask him any question about comics while you wait or eat your food.
– Switching topics, hints about the next Dragon Age alongside some art have been spilling out this weekend. Check out some of the art below:
– The eternal Aliens v. Predator feud apparently started in the nursery.
– What if H.P. Lovecraft had written the Fantastic Four (and would it be better than Warren Ellis’ take in Planetary?) posits Mike Sterling. (via Kotaku)
This came out a few days ago but I just got around to watching it. Nothing spectacular happens in this episode – looks like all those early trailers focusing on Master Chief were a little misleading. I’m thinking he’ll factor in much later in the series, but from the looks of things the wait won’t be unpleasant. Makes me sad the 360 is such a piece of shit. If two of them hadn’t already crapped out on me, I might get another one just for Halo 4.
Complimenting anything from Ohio goes against my every instinct, but the above video game themed halftime show is just too good to miss. My wow moment came right around the 3:30 mark but there plenty more after that. Well played, kids.