Welcome to Friday Night Flix, where there’s never a need to leave the couch or put on pants. Each week I’ll recommend an under-the-radar movie currently available on one or more of the major streaming platforms. They won’t all be classics, but every selection is guaranteed to be 100% watchable or your money back.
Welcome to the laziest Friday Night Flix EVER. You’re Next (Netflix) is a movie I saw ages ago (as did Jay) but I had to get it on DVD like a sucker. Now it’s available instantly! For streaming! On internets!
I am awful at remembering the details of movies. I see maybe 150 movies a year (down from around 300 in my prime) and a lot of them tend to be horror. The details would start to run together even if I didn’t have an awful memory to begin with. Which I do.
So without reading any synopses of this movie, without re-watching it (as any conscientious writer should do), and with about fifteen minutes before I have to leave for work (enjoy the typos!), here we go.
You’re Next is your basic survival horror thriller but smarter. It’s well shot, well acted and well directed. It was definitely among the best horror movies of 2012 (though I saw it in 2013 and technically I think it released in 2011 at festivals). The ways in which the requisite lone hero character turns the tables on the men assaulting this luxurious family estate are generally pretty believable. (At least insofar as it’s believable that any unarmed civilian can repel a heavily armed, well trained invading force.)
It’s also pretty funny. I can’t recite any specific jokes because it’s not an episode of South Park. But there are genuine laughs to be found in the bickering siblings of this rich, dysfunctional family. There are also some humorous beats in between the various deaths and dismemberments that populate movies such as this. You have to love seeing directors Ti West and Joe Swanberg show up to deliver a few funny lines before being unceremoniously and brutally executed.
Added bonus: Animal masks? For reals? Okay, sure, why not. These jackasses use crossbows when silenced rifles would work much better so why not add some ridiculously impractical masks? Aside from Halloween, very few movies ever bother to explain why their villains would decide to limit their vision and get all sweaty while they work. But I guess the image of a man in a bunny mask hacking someone to death with an axe is worth it.