Modern Borefare

My kid was sick today, which is just horrible. But the coughing, the sleepless nights, and the inconsolable crying are far from the worst part. While heartbreaking (and gross), your kid will get over the physical symptoms in a few days and a cold is nothing compared to the awful shit she’ll get into as she perfects the ability to harm herself. No, the worst part of having a sick kid is hiding it from daycare. For those that don’t have kids (Smart!) lemme ‘splain: if you can’t afford a hot Scandinavian au pair, you send your kid to daycare where she gets to spend nine hours rolling around on the floor right where ten parents just wiped the sidewalk filth off their shoes. This is a privilege you will pay many, many thousands of dollars for so you can go to work all day, before coming come to spend two…